Some Christmas knitting...

After not knitting all summer and fall because of a broken wrist, I have finally gotten back into knitting full steam...here are the Christmas outfits I have been working on for Lyllie and Ryder...

Ryder's Christmas Vest...not quite finished, but will be done by tonight just in time to go see Santa on Saturday...
this is the Cable Tank Top from Debbie Bliss-Baby Cashmerino 3 book



and Lyllie's Christmas dress...this is the Clara dress on Ravelry...



modeling her dress for me...



after I finish Ryder's vest it will be time to get back to socks!!! I am trying out the Kollage square dpn's and they are definitely much easier on my hands!! Anyway, more posts will follow soon!!

A long time away...

Wow...Time has once again flown between posts here!! The grandbabies are getting bigger, and really keeping this gramma busy!!
Lots has happened since last June, and for awhile, I just lost my knitting inspiration.
Lets see...what has been going on...
This past October, my son Zak, my grandson and I moved. It became apparent that Ryder was not going to be returned to his mother, so Zak and I did some talking and decided that to make the most secure and stable environment for Ryder we would continue to live together for now, so we definitely needed more space than my one bedroom apartment.
We thought that custody would be transferred to Zak on january 30th, but due to lots of red tape, and lots of court mess ups that didn't happen until March. But now it's official, and Zak has sole legal and permanent custody of Ryder...YEAH!!!!!!! this means that our little bubby boy will never again be hurt or neglected. We can all rest easy now knowing that our little guy is safe and knowing where he is every night. Maybe someday I will go in to more detail about all that happened to our precious little guy, but right now it is still very raw and very painful to talk about and think about. The good thing is that he is very happy, very healthy and very secure in his environment, and NOBODY will ever hurt him again!!
So...on the knitting front, I am knitting Wallaby sweaters for my grandbabies. I actually have three grandchildren now because Aimee's fiance has a 5 year old son, and as we have gotten to know each other, he has become my grandson as well. so am also knitting a Wallaby in a little bit of a bigger size. Zak's girlfriend also has a little boy who is 18 months old, and I am going to knit him one as well. So...4 Wallabys to be made for those cool summer evenings and autumn as we all know...autumn will come again!!LOL!! It feels good to be knitting again...I've missed my knitting needles and yarn.
So I guess that sums up my life for now. I will try to get back to posting more often, and will try to get pics of the babies up this weekend yet!! And now I am off to the Loopy Ewe website to see what new patterns Monica has there!!

It's beginning to look alot like...

Christmas!!! And what an exciting Christmas season this has been. It's so much fun to have the little ones. Even though they still are too young to understand what the season is all about, it's fun to watch them looking at the lights. And it's fun to anticipate Christmas Day when we get to watch them opening their presents and playing with their new toys.
Zak and I are so greatful to have Ryder with us as well and to know that he is safe and happy and well adjusted.
We go back to court on January 30th and at that time, legal custody will be transferred to Zak. It is hard to know that his mother has to lose her parental rights, but unfortunately, that is what it has all come down to in order for Ryder to be in a safe, secure and loving environment. Without going into alot of detail, let it suffice to say that she is overwhelmed by her drug addictions, and all the love and help and treatment in the world has not been enough to save her, or pull her from the depths of her addictions.

Thanksgiving was busy this year as well. My family came from Illinois, so we had a houseful. Also, Lyllie's birthday was on Thanksgiving this year. It's hard to believe that she is a year old already...time has flown by too fast!!
Here are some Thanksgiving/birthday pics...

Our Birthday Princess



Ryder all dressed up for the big day!!



Ryder's Christmas Tree!



In other news...we have a new member in our family...
we got a sweet little baby lovebird who came home yesterday...



His name is "Baby" for now. I haven't come up with a name that I like, and neither has anyone else in my family come up with a name that I like, so I have been calling him Baby...guess that's because I like it...LOL!! He is just soooooo sweet. He is 6 weeks old, and is still being handfed twice a day. So that means that every morning and every evening, I mix him this special baby bird formula and feed him from a syringe. He is also starting to eat seeds and pellets quite well, so by next week he will probably be finished handfeeding.
Ryder likes to look at him, but he doesn't want to touch him or hold him. He's not quite sure what to think of him.
Roxy is very curious and interested in him, and she doesn't seem to mind sharing her mama as long as I make sure she knows that she is still the MAIN baby of the house and the light of my life.
I used to raise cockatiels, and handfeed them. I also had an African Gray parrot for about 4 years. However, when he started reaching maturity, he became aggressive, and I was unable to even open his cage door to feed him and clean out his cage. I ended up selling him back to the breeder, and he is now with a couple who had several other birds as well.
Anyway, now that I no longer have the cats (they went to a friend's house after we got Ryder), I have been rebitten by the bird bug. I always knew I would have at least one bird again someday. I just don't plan on breeding them again.
Here are a few more pics of the new "Baby"...

smiling for the camera...



snuggled up to his birdy blankie...yes, they actually make birdy blankies, and Baby loves his!!



Put the camera away now, mama...I go night-night!!



I hope everybody who reads this is having a joyful Christmas season so far.
And to those who have lost loved ones this past year, let your cherished memories carry you through this holiday season, and know that they are celebrating this Christmas in the presence of our Heavenly Father. We feel the loss of our PawPaw as this is our first holiday season without him, but we know he is close in our hearts and is sending us his love from heaven.

A Puky Day

So...yesterday Ryder woke up and was very fussy. Let me just say, he always wakes up happy...so I couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. Zak put him in his high chair and we gave him some cheerios and tried to feed him some yogurt...his usual morning fare...he wouldn't eat. just got mad and wiped the cheerios off his tray and onto the floor...Roxy was having a hayday!! She likes cheerios too. I decided that Ryder needed to go back to bed, so I fixed him a bottle and wrapped him up in a blanket...he likes to be swaddled up still in a blanket. I think it's a security issue for him. We sat down to rock and he drifted peacefully off to sleep...ahhhh--there is just nothing like a baby sleeping peacefully in your arms.
Well the sleep lasted for all of 3 minutes when suddenly Ryder's eyes opened wide, and the next thing I knew, he and i were covered in what seemed like gallons of puke!!!! I haven't been puked on like that since Zak and Aimee were little! and in the midst of all his morning fussiness, it never occured to me that he could be sick with the flu...sigh...the puking continued throughout the morning and into the afternoon...poor baby. and Zak had to work, so guess who was doing bucket loads of laundry and dealing with a sick little boy. It subsided by midafternoon, and gramma and Ryder just spent the day rocking and cuddling. He started drinking pedialyte last evening, and today has been eating ravenously! Thank God it was a short lived bug, and I hope that it doesn't hit again for a good long while!
he is sleeping now in his new bedroom. Zak got his room painted over the past couple of days--a pretty blue. We are going to decorate his room in Elmo because he just loves Elmo! He is getting Elmo live for Christmas. Every time we walk past Elmo live in the stores, he points and laughs and waits for us to push Elmo's foot. He just loves that thing!! I'll get some pics when we have his room all done and post them. We just wanted him to have a really happy room. He was living in a horrible dark dump of an apartment before, and we want everything here to be bright and happy for him!!

NO...I haven't fallen off the planet

I know it's been a very long time since I have blogged. I am going to try to get back to keeping up better here. It's been a very long, hard, chaotic summer. Very much a roller coaster ride.
To start--we all miss our PawPaw very much. I know he is in a better place now, and he is no longer in pain, and he is our angel watching over us all...but that doesn't fill the void his absence creates here. The void is only a physical one though...His spirit stays very close to all of us in our hearts.

After returning home from Illinois, because of some really horrible circumstances with Ryder's mom, he was placed in my son's custody. So...Ryder, Zak and I were all living in my one bedroom apartment. It was definitely a tad bit crowded. At least my apartment was fairly nice sized for one bedroom. Well, as the summer went on, it became more and more obvious that Ryder would be staying with Zak permanently, so after alot of contemplating and planning, Zak and I decided to find a 3 bedroom home for all of us rather than Zak and Ryder moving into a place of their own. We felt that by living together it would give Ryder more stability and security, which he really needs. So, we moved into our new home at the end of September!! It's quite nice and we have been working hard painting and fixing up to make it ours.
Lyllie is also doing very well. I can't believe she will be a year old already on Thanksgiving day!!! Where has the time gone? Speaking of which...our new house is 5 minutes away from my daughter's house, so I get to spend alot more time with her and Lyllie as well. Before the move, we were 15 miles aprt, but getting there in Minneapolis traffic could take anywhere from 40 minutes to over an hour. I love being this close to all of my babies--big ones and little ones!!

I will leave you all with these updated pics and a video...

Our Little Lion...Ryder in his Halloween Costume






Lyllie...Our Little Diva Girl!!

That was a good Ice Cream Cone!!

thank you PawPaw...

Just a quick note to tell everyone that PawPaw passed away this morning at 9:40 AM. He was still here at home with all of us, and he got a send off filled with all of our love. It brings us all great peace to know that we fulfilled his final wish of remaining at home until the end. He held on much longer than we thought he would, and we know it's because he didn't want to leave us. He was a part of our lives for 18 years, but gave us a lifetime of love and wonderful memories. It still doesn't seem long enough, and I wish we could have had him longer so he could watch the great- grandbabies grow up as he did the grandbabies, but I am grateful for the time that we had him. i just wish he didn't have to go so soon. he left peacefully though, and we still feel his love all around us...but his chair looks so empty.
Thank you all for your care and support during this time.

Saying "HI!" and looking for hugs...

Hi friends...I'm in Illinois with my mom, stepdad and my brother's family right now. My stepdad is in the end stage of terminal cancer, and very close to starting the next part of his journey. We have hospice care for him now, and he is getting morphine and ativan every two hours. He has been more than a "stepfather" to me...he has been my daddy and PawPaw to my kids for the past 18 years, so it is very hard to watch him leaving us, and very hard to watch my mom go through this, as my grandma, her mom, just passed away less than two years ago. Even though I know he is not really leaving us, but continuing on in the next part of his soul's journey, it is still very hard. I hope I am keeping him comfortable. It brings us peace to know that he is at home with us, and not in a nursing home or hospital. When he takes his final breath, he will be surrounded by his family and those who love him.
Today my sister-in-law and I went to make all the funeral arrangements and cemetary arrangements so my mom wouldn't have to do that again. When my grandma passed away none of my mom's brother's (there are 5 of them) would help with arrangements, expenses, etc... so it was me and my mom and stepdad that did that, and now my mom doesn't have her husband by her side for support, so we went today so she wouldn't have to.
My kids and grandbabies weren't able to make the trip down with me...they were not able to get LOA's at work as I have been able to, so hopefully they will be able to join us for PawPaw's funeral. My hospital is very family oriented and very understanding in giving me the time off to be with my family right now. My mom really needs me right now, so I am glad that I could be here with her, but am very lonely for home and my kids and grandbabies.
I just wanted to come here and leave a note of what is going on, as this is my home on the web, and I feel a little less homesick, and a little less lonely being able to come here and share life, joy and sorrow with my friends. Thank you all for being a part of my journey here on earth, and sharing my pain and heartache.
Hugs-
Cindy

A tribute to PawPaw with his great grandbabies...

PawPaw and Ryder



PawPaw and Lyllie



My niece Rylie and Ryder sitting with PawPaw...
he loves his grandbabies and great-grandbabies!! We know he will be our angel in heaven watching out over all his babies!!